Today in Music Theory my professor made a Yoda reference. While I think Star Wars was alright Yoda was definitely wrong. "Do or do not; there is no try" ??? This quote assaults that whole Cohen Brothers effort-based ethos which I love so dearly. 'Trying' by definition would be some form of doing but I suppose he meant "do" in the way that effects certain results. It seems he meant "stand up and deliver or get out!" Maybe this abrasive imperative doesn't quite fit the mold for his whole ambiguous, quasi-New Age aura? Perhaps there is a reason I cling to this whole validation-by-effort thing...ah, yes! I've got it!- anxiety on account of impending trials. With final exams and an organ jury looming before me I feel a wee bit uncomfortable defining myself in terms of academic success/failure (surely to be extended into my future professional life). The solution? I shall insulate myself with the consoling padding of my inherent dignity as a child of God, or to put it like a priest I heard recently, "We're all very special." (Indeed, it's true, but I can't help but poke fun at such an overwrought expression). Of course, I don't think that everyone should get an 'A' for effort and amble recklessly though life with nothing to show for it; I'm merely suggesting a sane balance. Yoda was too harsh. Sometimes we work hard and receive a just reward. Other times we bust our ass and leave empty handed. Strangely enough, it's humbling- and again I know "We are not in control." In other words, stressful times can restore proper perspective. Of course, flip-flopping bastard that I am, I'll likely come full circle when an 'A' comes back on one of those tests; my fears- unfounded. There's nothing like that feeling of being the existentialist Juggernaut. I'll lounge on the beach of my proverbial island high on the speed of self-determination while sipping cocktails with Gilligan cursing John Donne. So, Yoda, 'try' time is every time- to be rewarded for trying, for the effort to bear fruit? That time's much rarer. And therein lies the only distinction between 'doing' and 'trying.' As a hippie once said (and the Bible) "to everything there is a season." (more cliche courtesy of Pete Seeger). But, all things in good time. Speaking of seasons, it is winter and sleeting like hell. I hope class is canceled in the morning.